Thursday, September 29, 2005

Aku pasrah.......

PRESSURE
I regret this,
I was sad,
I was frustrated,
I was shocked,
I am blur,
I never expect to face such test,
Everyday I faced my day,
With happiness and eagerness,
to learn and to gain knowledge,
For many years,
since I were in my little house,
I had known all of them,
Khow their heart, kindness and generosity,
I loved them,
I respect them,
Just like I respect my parent,
But why?
Why now?
Why you all oppress me,
With the problem I always worried about,
In time I need lots of love and attention,
I found myself trap in the middle,
I am hopeless,
I am defenseless,
But know this,
If I don't have your trust anymore,
Let God be my witness,
Let Him be my protector,
Let Him punish the one,
who make me suffer.
I will accept the fate,
although this heart said 'no',
But hear this,
I shall not be myself anymore,
This event,
have change me,
into someone that is,
so pathetic and useless,
I have no guts anymore,
to face more challenge,
I have nothing to sacrifice anymore,
I'm now all alone,
Alone on this ruthless world,
I've no source of inspiration,
All I did was wrong,
All I did was bad,
I don't know what to say anymore,
Let me alone,
please release me from this horrible thing,
I don't care about mysef any longer,
I don't even care about my greds anymore,
I only wish one thing,
to die,
as a humble servant,
to Him,
I am doom,
I've lost my dignity and their trusts,
There is no reason for me,
to live as a normal person,
Please take me dear God,
Or I shall take it myself.

Thursday, September 22, 2005

Spooky!!!

Malam ni aku duduk umah sorang-sorang sebab ayah hari ni sampai hari Ahad berada di Taman Negara untuk program guru tadika JAIM. Aku yg sungguh sengal ni terpaksalah duduk umah sorang2. Tapi, okey jugak sebab time ni la aku nak menguji keberanian aku. Anyway, aku nak ucapkan selamat menjalani pembedahan buat kakak ku, kak dila yg akan menjalani pembedahan pada esok hari. Insya Allah, berkemungkinan besar aku ngan baid akan jenguk dia kat HUKM pada hari Sabtu. Lepas habis exam ni, aku rasa begitu lega dan aman sekali, macam orang baru kahwin! Tapi, malangny markah yg aku dapat so far kurang memberangsangkan. Hari ni, aku dapat markah sejarah dan syariah serta math mod. sejarah 78%, syariah 80%, dan math mod 79%. For my BM, kertas 2 soalan 1 dapat 24/30, soalan 2 tak sempat kira, tapi hari ni aku bgitu frust sekali sebab soalan ketiga aku tidak mencapai standar yang aku nak. Soalan tanya tentang ayat sonsang, so aku ingatkan sonsangkan maknanya, rupanya just tukar kdudukan subjek dan predikat je! Aku dapat 0/6 markah bagi soalan tu! Tapi, aku redha, mungkin Allah tunjukkan aku perkara sebegini supaya aku tak buat kesilapan dalam REAL EXAM. Cakap tentang SPM ni, kitaorang baru je dapat jadual SPM 2005. Let me fill you up with the schedule. Kitaorang start pekse pada 9 November 2005 until 2 Disember 2005. The first paper will be Pendidikan Syariah Islamiah 2 (9/11/05), Bahasa Arab Tinggi 1 & 2 serta Pendidikan Syariah Islamiah 1 (10/11/05), Bahasa Melayu 1 & 2 serta Sejarah 1 (14/11/05), Bahasa Inggeris 1 & 2 serta Sejarah 2 (15/11/05), Matematik 1 & 2 (16/11/05), Fizik 1, 2 & 3 (17/11/05), Pendidikan Al-Quran dan As-Sunnah 1 (18/11/05), Matematik Tambahan 1 & 2 (23/11/05), Kimia 1, 2, & 3 (29/11/05), Biologi 1, 2 & 3 (30/11/05), dan akhir sekali English for Science and Technology, EST 1 & 2 (2/12/05). In adalah jadual bagi pelajar aliran sains tulen. Yang lin tu, mintak maaf ye! Okeylah, aku ni pun dah letih ni. so, see you in the other time!

Monday, September 19, 2005

Susah giler!

A'skum.
Apa khabar semua? Lama tak dengar berita. Hari ni aku begitu stress sekali. Sebab? Kerana hari ni aku tak dapat nak perform well dalam subjek yg paling aku sukai, iaitu biologi! Aku pun tak tahu pasal hari ni aku rasa macam tak sedap hati je, tu yg buat slek tu! Kertas 2 kompom hancus, kertas 3 boleh la, kertas 1 ada harapan. Tapi, as far as my instinct said, my bio paper will surely drop badly compared to middle exam. Esok pulak ada add math, the most hardest and wicked subject yang pernah aku belajar. Bukan main susah lagi nak score dalam paper ni. Mungkin aku ni pemalas orangnya, tu sebab add math asyik fail je. Since tomorrow is my last subject for the trial, I beg to everyone, please pray for my success in trial exam, and better hope I get 8AS'. That's my target! Okey la, cukup la cite tentang ni, ni aku nak citekan pulak tntang sambutan family day SMKTP. It seems that everything was in clear cut. No argued, no this and no that. Everything was nice and teachers also brought up their offsprings to the school on that day. There were many games and lots of fun. For your information, Saturday is our school days, just to replace the future week after Raya so that students can enjoy themselves without thinking getting back to school. So, after the games, we assemble and there were prizes-giving ceremony and lucky draw. Unfortunately, only the hosteliers were involved in this event. Outsiders like me were not allowed to picked the lucky-draw prize although our name was called. Isn't that suck?! Because of that, I felt that this whole thing were just for the hosteliers. The original plan is to have the hostel dinner. But, with a changing of plan, I think so, the dinner was brought up to the family day. That's why I didn't felt so good about this. Why must we bother other's event? So, I gave my coupon, which I should used it to take the food and beverages, to the hosteliers 'coz that was their day and I have no right to interfer their event. With a hungry stomach, I mbrace myself until I reached home where my father bought me 'nasi goreng kampung'. Marzuki, one of my classmate said, "that was the most boringful family day I ever had." That's al I can wrote now. Until we met again, BYE!!!!

Thursday, September 15, 2005

Kabare!

Long time no see la you'll guys! What's up?! I hope you all in a pink of health. Well, today I just finished my chemistry test. It was heavenly relived!! Tapi minggu depan kitaorang ada pekse bio dan add maths, dan hakikatnya aku memang lemah dalam add maths. Bukan aku sorang je, ramai lagi rasanya budak kat Malaysia ni yang lemah add maths. Anyway, aku nak ambil kesempatan di sini untuk mengucapkan SELAMAT HARI MALAYSIA yang akan disambut pada hari esok buat seluruh warga Malaysia. Saya harap semoga warga Malaysia, terutamanya mereka yang sebaya saya akan sentiasa mengingati perjuangan nenek moyang kita dalam kemerdekaan serta penubuhan Malaysia. Hari sabtu ni, sekolah akan adakan Hari Keluarga pulak! aku pun tak tahu bila masa sekolah buat keputusan nak adakan hari keluarga di sekolah. Selalunya diorang buat antara guru, staff serta ahli keluarga mereka, tapi kali ni berbeza sikit. Mungkin pengetua ni nak buat perubahan kot! Anyway, wish me luck for tomorrow exam which is EST, stands foe English for Science and Technology. Bye!!

Friday, September 09, 2005

Minggu Pekse!

Kepada Semua Para Pembaca Sekalian,
Doakan Kejayaan Saya Dalam Menghadapi,
Minggu-Minggu,
Peperiksaan Percubaan SPM 2005.
Hanya Allah Sahaja Yang Dapat Membalas Jasa Anda!

Sunday, September 04, 2005

Happy Birthday to me!!

Ahaks!
Yesterday was my birthday la! Once again, happy birthday to myself. Birthday, birthday jugak, dinner tetap dinner. Malam semalam kami para pengawas SKMTP mengadakan jamuan tahunan di Medan Ikan Bakar Umbai (yg baru tu!). Walaupun ada kelam-kabut sikit, tapi semuanya smooth, nothing big shows up. Acara dimulakan undian para pengawas bagi melantik ketua dan penolong ketua thn depan, then bacaan doa, pas tu melantak, ucapan guru-guru serta pengetua, ucapan ketua pengawas sesi 2004/2005, some games, cabutan bertuah, persembahan, hadiah dan balik. Walaupun semalam birthday aku, tapi aku rasa tak bersemangat nak meraikan mahupun menerima sebarang ucapan 'happy birthday' drp semua orang. Kalau dulu, akulah yg paling beria-ia nak sambut birthday aku, tapi sekarang semuanya hilang. Kalau dulu aku anggap birthday aku sbg salah satu event yang paling aku suka, tapi tahun ni segala-galanya berubah. Dgn. problem yg menggugat hati dan perasaan aku, dgn nak exam SPM tahun ni, maka semalam birthday aku takde sape nak sambut. Aku pun sendiri tak nak sambut birthday aku sendiri. Just wait for the day to end, just like that. aku semalam asyik teringatkan mak, sebab everytime birthday aku, emak yg tak pernah lupa nak wish kat aku happy birthday. tapi sekarang mak dah takde, dah takde makna lagi birthday aku tahun ni dan selamanya. Semua orang sibuk dgn hal masing-masing, aku hanya duduk keseorangan dan hanya menerima ucapan tahniah sahaja. Nothing big for me this year, no cake, no ice-cream, no nuggets, no cokes no nothing. Hanya dinner semalam je yg aku anggap sbg hadiah buat birthday aku yg ke-17 tahun ni. Thanks badan pengawas SMKTP, especially form 2 and form 4 kerana telah berjaya mengacarakan majlis dinner semalam, jasa baikmu takkan dilupakan.


>Menghayati pemandangan di jeti umbai.


>Gadis ayu!!!!


>Jejaka kacak yang bakal menggoncang dunia!


>The KPs


>Sepadan tak? Jgn marah wan!


>Kenangan bersama rakan seperjuanganku.


>Me, farra, ati and pidah


>Time to vote for the new leadership!


>Us with Puan Hjh Hazizah plus her husband


>Kenangan terakhir pengawas form 5 dgn ustaz guru pengawas